That Conversation
by DeviWan
Summary: In Hidan’s opinion, the boy was just too pretty. He couldn’t help but wonder what the boy feels when he walks around the hideout. He was an angel amongst the others. And so, when the opportunity presents itself, Hidan just couldn’t hold back. Yaoi.


Title: That Conversation

Pairing: Hidan/Itachi

Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto.

_**Warning**_: _**Yaoi, but not directly. There'll be descriptions. And language also. **_

That Conversation

In Hidan's opinion, the boy was just too damn pretty. He couldn't help but wonder what the boy feels when he walks around the hideout. He was an angel amongst the others. And so, when the opportunity presents itself, Hidan just couldn't hold back.

It's ever so rare that the Akatsuki as a whole would sit and eat together. But when that does happen, it was truly a sight to behold. Like tonight, for example. The leader had called them all in for a long meeting. After that, everybody was just too damn lazy to move out. So they ended up eating together for the first time in two years.

And really, it was just pure chaos.

The large kitchen was filled with killing intent, mostly from Sasori. Deidara had conjured up another argument about true art, not that Hidan cared to listen. Kakuzu had put his coins on the dark table and was counting, but when Kisame _accidentally_ knocked them off, he just snapped. But they all calmed down, eventually, when the food finally arrived. And lucky for Akatsuki, they at least had one woman as a member who can cook.

So they sat down and ate. Because they haven't had meals in like these in years, they preserved the quietness. The first half of dinner was quiet, safe the slurping and the sighing in content. Then, Hidan just had to remember about his thoughts on the Uchiha.

"Ay, Uchiha," he called across the table.

And without a doubt, he had everybody's attention. Even the leader listened.

"You know, I always thought that you were too pretty. When you walk these halls, don't you feel out of place? Like an angel in hell?"

Itachi raised his long eyebrows. Really, how was he supposed to see this coming?

"And you know Jashin, right? Of course you do, every body does. Well, since I have to give him a sacrifice everyday, I always think of you before doing it each time. Because, you know, Jashin would fuck love to have you up there with him. You with your pale skin, he'll love to make you bleed and watch as your blood drips down, down and down. He'll love it, he really fucking will".

"Hidan, what the hell are you on about, un?"

Hidan ignored the blonde. "And then there's you neck. Do you know what I had to do to finally see that neck of yours? Always covered by that fucking cloak. You know, I daydreamed once. I saw myself ripping the damn thing off and grabbing your neck. I squeezed so hard that you whimpered. Of course, Jashin loved the sound so much that I had to do it again and again. Blood would flow from your mouth and down your neck and my hand. Jashin was so damn pleased".

"Hidan, shut up. I wanna have dinner," Kakuzu mumbled, embarrassed by his partner's behaviour. But then a thought would strike him. The money lover thought that if Hidan pissed the Uchiha off enough, he'd be killed, finally. So he just let him be.

"But you know what I'd really like to do to ya?" Hidan asked, grinning like an idiot. "I found this empty dungeon under our hideout, it'll be perfect. I'd just love to tie you up real tight. I'd tie you by the wrists to the ceiling and spank that ass. Then I'd bring out my scythe and slowly and shallowly cut you. Hot red blood would drip down your back and down you ass. And then Jashin would fucking demand more. He'd demand to see you face while I do this. I'd somehow get caught in the moment and drop my scythe. So I ended up using my nails to cut you".

"What interesting dreams you have," Konan said. She picked some vegetables up and put them on Itachi's plate, glaring at him and demanding that he finishes all of them.

Hidan rolled his eyes. "Anyways, since you don't have any scar, I was really happy that I was the first to scar you. Your porcelain skin would glow in the moonlight as blood runs down you body. Since it was all so tempting, I would lean down and lick the blood from you neck. Then I'd dig my nails in you so deep that you screamed. And dear Jashi, what a wonderful sound that was. I was freaking obsessed. You'd pant and mewled in pain as you long hair got stuck to your small body. It was fucking heaven".

He paused.

It's a wonder that Itachi hadn't said anything yet.

"What happens next?" Zetsu demanded.

Hidan grinned. "Well, being the little vixen that he _is_, he escaped," he said. He was really smug, proud that he got people on the edge of their seats.

"How?" Kisame pleaded.

"He fucking seduced me. I remember," at this, everybody sweat dropped. Somehow, Hidan's dream turned into a story. "That he wrapped his legs around my waist. Jashin was so damn happy. Then I remembered groping his ass and squeezing real tight. He'd moan and mewl, and then he'd grind our dicks together. Up and down, up and down. He'd moan my name, demanding that I cut him deeper, harder. I remembered that I'd licked him everywhere, tasting his blood and sweat".

At this point, nobody remembered when Hidan's daydream turned into a recount of an event.

"And then, the little shit head butted me. He somehow got down and escaped".

"That sounds awfully unlike you, Itachi," Pein commented.

"Don't forget, Leader-sama, that this didn't really happen," Sasori mumbled.

"It doesn't matter," the Jashinist boasted. "After that dream, I hunted him down; because Jashin-sama told me to rape the little shit. I obviously had no problem with that. I went straight to his room. He didn't lock the door; the little shit thought he was invincible. So I went in and locked the door. I found the little vixen brushing his hair, and what a cute sight that was. I grabbed him and threw in on the bed. The fucker gave up a pretty good fight, but I was bigger than him. I tied him to his own bed and ripped his clothes off. He's a sight to behold, I tell you. He's so damn gorgeous I nearly ate him whole. Wouldn't you like that, Zetsu?"

The half man, half plant grunted.

"Damn it, Hidan. Hurry up and tell us the damn story," Kisame hissed.

"Well, anyways, I made him bleed a little. Just for fun, you know? He was gonna use the Sharingan shit on me, but he didn't get to it. I grabbed his cock first," here there were a few splutters around the room. "I squeezed and rubbed, getting him all erected. Of course, I didn't have to worry about myself. I was a true man. I got erected just by looking at the little vixen. I turned him onto his stomach, having his ass sticking in the air. It was great, I tell you. I pushed a finger into him, just to see how tight he was. And let me tell you fuckers, he was real tight. So when the time came that I pushed into him, you can imagine how I felt. I grabbed his hips, so tight that they bruised. But really, the little shit was just too fragile".

The Jashinist paused to get a drink. The others glanced nervously at Itachi, weary of when he'll snap.

And really, they shouldn't even be listening… … … … and imagining this. They should just get up, clean their plates and go away. But it just happens that Akatsuki is full of horny men and a yaoi fan-woman… … and a plant man who has nothing better to do.

A feral grin spread across the Jashinist's face. "Now here's the best part. I spanked his ass and bit his neck. He moaned and mewled, whimpering out my name. I wasn't sure if he was saying fucker or harder, but it didn't matter. I gripped his hips harder and slammed into him. Again and again and again. And each time, I'd hit the little bundle of nerves and he'd scream. I remembered the sound of his bed hitting the wall; again and again and again. His wall would squeeze my cock so tight and I couldn't help but just slap him. He was too damn pretty. And then he came, squirting his cum all over his pillow. I thrust a few more times, before filling his tight hole with my cum. I filled it all the way that it spilled out of his ass".

Silence.

"Well shit," someone murmured.

"The best part is that I didn't pull out of him all night. He was hot!"

It didn't take long, no, not at all. In one quick movement, Deidara and Kisame ran off, holding their erections. Kakuzu sighed; disappointed that Hidan was still alive. Together he and Sasori walked off, exchanging comments about the story. Konan glided out of the room, blushing furiously at her own imagination. Zetsu disappeared into the ground, saying something about eating Itachi whole. Pein just stared. In the hall, someone yelled, "It didn't even really happen. Hidan was just saying what he dreamed".

"I'm not going yet, I haven't finished my plate," he said, before going back to eating.

Hidan turned his head to Itachi. With graceful movements, Itachi got up and walked around the table, heading towards Hidan. He weaved his hand through his silky hair as an old habit. He finally reached Hidan.

The Jashinist was overjoyed when Itachi reached his small hand into his hair. Hidan purred as Itachi played with his silver hair. '_Maybe I'm getting some tonight,_' he thought. But that thought disappeared when Itachi gripped his hair tightly and slammed it onto the table. Across the table, Pein choked on his drink.

"Fuck!" he cursed. "What the fucking hell, bitch?! Ow, fuck. Fuck you, bitch, fuck you!" Then he yelled again. "What the hell did I do?"

He was responded with a sandal flying straight for his head. It belonged to Itachi.

"Surprisingly, for an Uchiha, Itachi is awfully effeminate. I wouldn't be surprised if he is able to get pregnant," the Leader of the Akatsuki also received a sandal o the head.

"That was just plain kinky, fucker," Hidan muttered.

He trotted out of the room, intending on making his dream come true! _{Insert heroic music in the background}_

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I know what you're thinking. Wierd and random. Wandom.  
But i haven't updated one-shots in a while, so I thought I'd make up for it.  
Do enjoy.

And please, the review botton isn't far.


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